I have written before about the awesome Bramon Wine Estate just outside of Plett. I still find something outrageously cool about the fact that you can leave the beach and be sipping bubbly 20 minutes later in the middle of a vineyard with beautiful views of the Outeniqua Mountains. On my last visit The Queen (then merely The Princess) and I quaffed some bubbly and were so impressed we ended up getting some for our wedding. This time round was a different celebration...my birthday. This time we were going not only to drink (although we would be doing plenty of that by the way), we were going to check out the menu.
At a long table literally in between the vineyards sat a hilarious crew made up of Pocket Rocket, Justice, Vin D, Shmici, Godmother E, Hotspur, Pafoof, The Bear, The Dragon and The Queen. The bubbly flowed and the menus were presented. Interesting. Basically, it's a selection of different tapas that you eat with freshly baked bread. The bread itself was amazing and we were presented with hummus, caprese salads, rocket pesto, smoked salmon, pickled mackerel, olives, peppered beef and more. The first thing I noticed is that I had bought suspiciously similar produce from a deli in Plett. I eventually asked our waiter (an absolute beauty by the way - obviously a stoner) about this and he unapologetically told me that they buy the stuff from the deli too. "So..." I asked our boy "What do you guys actually cook here?" I was not really prepared for the response. "Nothing." So..in a nutshell they buy the produce and bake some bread. I'm not even sure if they do that to be honest. I was seriously pissed off until someone told me maybe I should just appreciate how clever that actually is. I suppose it is but I was still left with a horrible taste in my mouth.
The real highlight was still to come. Before I tell you about it let's play a game. Suppose you are a waiter and someone gives you what is obviously a surprise birthday cake. What is the worst thing you could do with that cake? Answer: Drop it on the kitchen floor. That's exactly what happened folks. But get this...keeping with our game, if you were the waiter who dropped what IS OBVIOUSLY A SURPRISE CAKE what is the worst way to handle the situation. Answer: Announce to the table that you have dropped the cake. Surely pulling aside someone and explaining the situation is better? Surely trying to actually make something edible in a restaurant is better? One would think so. Eventually the manager brought us some chocolate truffles as compensation. The first one was good, the second was really good. We began feeling sick by the fourth but ate about 8 each out of spite. To their credit they brought a few shooters and comped a bottle of bubbly. Not a bad recovery I guess.
We left with opinion very much divided. Some thought Bramon's idea of simply unpacking food and re-presenting it was cheeky and cheap. Others thought it was business-savvy and brilliant. One thing I can say is their bubbly is delicious and the setting is beautiful. At least we all agreed on that.
Give them a call on 044534 8007